I try to stay positive in the face of all of I hear, see and encounter. I’m not referring just to the conditions of the wider world but to my world as well. We all carry a personal world and that’s the sum total of what we’ve done and what we believe to be true and act upon, as if it were true and the reality of that is determined by how our personal truth measures up against the greater truth. The greater truth isn’t ever seen by mortals because mortality is a veil and it contains the parameters of our personal truth, which isn’t really truth but merely the demands that our false self makes upon appearances to support it. It’s that ‘seeing through a glass darkly’ thing. I’ve mentioned several times over the years that when the truth takes off her clothes, the world disappears. The world is only a projection of our mortal dreams, measured against the time continuum in which they are shown to be nothing more than the shadows on the wall of Plato’s Cave, or Plato’s Retreat, depending on what you are into (grin).
I try to keep a positive attitude and that is no mean feat, given the sort of things that happen to me and often defy explanation or description. Why am I talking about this? It’s because of the vast amount of cynicism I see operating all around me, in my smaller world and in the greater world at large. I was told that July would not be an easy passage for me and it has proven to be so. Hardly a day goes by for me when I don’t get slammed by something that comes down to misunderstandings and results in a lack of support, while I try to stay an industrious fellow, in my general nose to the grindstone way. I always believe that I am turning a corner but it’s proven to be something that extends far beyond anything I ever anticipated or expected it to be.
For most of my life I’ve been up against it and it has whittled me down until there’s hardly anyone left at all. I suspect that’s a good thing overall, even if it doesn’t always feel like it is. These days part of me wants to head for the Himalayas or some remote part of Thailand. I suspect that my meager holdings are enough for me to maintain at a level possible in those places and I don’t feel like there’s that much holding me around here to make it worth remaining, in the constantly fluctuating groove I am moving through.
As incredibly difficult as my passage has been, I’ve always believed that there was a point to it and that one day I would understand the why and wherefore of it all. The more recent years have been more stable and I have been more dependable too. The world is changing in the ways I have expected it to and it’s run true to form. The only thing I haven’t been very good at is predicting the when of things and one shouldn’t engage in such speculation anyway. I’m learning that.
I see an outpouring from various sources that say this whole thing with Murdoch and all the rest of the veil rending phenomena that the cosmos is engaged in will come to no good result and that soon enough it will all go back to business as usual. I don’t believe that. What I see is evil engaged in its own destruction. That is the essential nature of evil. Evil does eventually destroy itself. It always has and it always will. To me, we are all part of a cosmic drama whose purpose is a lasting lesson that is geared toward our higher evolution; for those of us willing to take advantage of it. Our job is to live and learn and become the product and the fruit of a greater understanding. If we don’t, we get recycled until we do. There are never a great many of us that are full time engaged in this. It’s been my long time observation that most people come to a point of compromise with the world around them. They make arrangements and they make deals. If you don’t do these things you become a peculiarity to the people who were more well disposed toward you when they were more like you, before they made their accommodations with death and the devil.
The world is the way it is not because of the Rupert Murdoch’s and the rest of the satanic entities, like the Rothschild’s, along with their enablers and high end employees. The world is the way it is because the bulk of humanity makes accommodations with them, believes what they tell them and endures the wars and economic fluctuations that are intentionally manipulated to the cyclic distress of the poor fools who put up with all of that shit. The greater darkness is fed by the countless tributaries of smaller darkness that flows into it, in response to the prompting and lures of what flows out of it. We’re where we are because of what we are.
I tell myself that being isolated in my little world is not such a bad thing. I tell myself I would rather work for nothing and the general good, however indifferent the general population might be to it, than to be a more welcome member of a corrupt and doomed society. I assure myself that I am supported by invisible means, which seems to be true and that despite the expectations of various cynical and faithless people, who expect things from me according to a time line of their own creation that I am doing the right thing. I have no way of knowing if this is true. What I do know is that it’s certainly not what I see around me. It’s one of those, “oh ye of little faith” things. For me, one is either reliant on the cosmos or they are reliant on other people and I don’t want any deeper contact with people who have little faith in the cosmos and even less in me. It’s hard enough maintaining my own, without relying on people who don’t have any. I’ll be more detailed about that at Origami when it comes up tomorrow or the next day.
I get tired of people attributing irresistible power to demonic regimes like Israel and all her puppet nations. I get tired of people attributing irresistible power to corporations, individuals and dying systems that are all dying and being exposed in front of my eyes. I get tired of holding the fort and believing and affirming that the dawn is soon to break, while the dawn takes its own sweet time (grin) but there’s too much evidence in my invisible account and in the encouragement of my invisible friends for me to be inclined to doubt it. It seems to me that we endure and soldier on, or we betray our deeper being for the false comfort of superficial lies, with the loss of our integrity and honor. When you’re not a casual liar for the purpose of convenience and self interest, lies are usually very transparent. With me, lies are usually exposed when the evidence to the contrary comes flying up into my head the moment I hear them.
I can’t answer for the way others live and do business. I also cannot embrace cynicism and the idea that we are all doomed. In that regard it is Nature that always lifts my spirits. I’ve had to battle depression for many years and I’ve used different things to militate against it. I recently found something that does but like most things that don’t have the imprimatur of the pharmaceutical industry, people object to my right to use it, as well as make demands that I meet some personal criteria of theirs, when I never agreed to any of that. I do not go along to get along because I’ve seen where that leads. That has brought me to the point where I can literally walk out the door and disappear and not have to be concerned about anything or anyone I leave behind, because they will be fine and I have no contractual debts or obligations that can’t be settled simply by leaving what I’ve set in motion to satisfy any demands anyone might feel they have a right to make on me. It’s a rare kind of freedom to be in a position where you are unaffected by the games people like to play to make you behave the way they want you to, as if you were wearing their team uniform and had agreed to bend over whenever they need the reassurance.
I have one employer and one duty and nothing else applies. If it isn’t directed from there then it’s mislabeled when it shows up at my door. There are no apologies or explanations I have to give or make. I can apologize for being stupid enough to put myself in some people’s hands and I can explain that none of the things on offer are important enough to me to go through what it takes to appease people’s profit motives and control freak imperatives. That’s about it. If you want to be cynical about things working out and if you have no faith in the cosmic plan then you might as well go to work for the people who are victimizing you because absent the one plan you become an automatic member of the other. Big time deceptions and small time deceptions only vary by degree and being actual pathways; the smaller eventually runs into the other Just as all water eventually reaches the sea. I’m going to keep on believing because I have come too far to take that exit into a world of doubt, manipulated by faith killers who’ve created an economy out of it.